Chapter Thirty-Nine
It took a minute to fully comprehend what Josh was saying.
“We’re what?”
“Leaving. I just talked with the President and he wants us on our way back right now. I’m here to sit with her in case she wakes up while you pack your stuff.” The Deputy Chief of Staff deftly ignored the wounded puppy look the other man was giving him, instead pivoting so that he could sit at the edge of the bed and take the washcloth from his hands. “Giles says there’s no reason to think that the invisible wall is still standing, seeing as your girlfriend saved us from the big baddie.” He grinned humorlessly, features softening when the anxious worry in his friend’s expression failed to fade. “Look, I’ll stay with her. And we won’t leave until we absolutely have to, ‘kay? But Sam, we need—”
He held up a hand. “I know.”
“We can’t stay—”
Sam nodded, eyes lingering on the unconscious redhead. “I know. We’ve already been gone far too long.”
“Toby’s been saying all morning that there’s probably a new administration.” Josh smiled boyishly. “He’s already making reservations in Memphis.”
“We’re not flying?”
“Oh, we are. The President’s making sure there are some guys waiting for us in Jackson. The reservations in Memphis are just in case. You know, we don’t wanna end up in some other crackpot town with a bunch of vampires and crazies that like us even less than this crowd.” Still no relief. Josh sighed and combed a hand through his hair. “I know you’re worried about her, Sam, but she’s gonna be fine. All right?”
“I know. I know she’s going to be fine. I just…” He licked his lips and frowned. “I wasn’t expecting to leave so soon. Giles said she might be out for a day or so. I wanted…I don’t want her to think that I just left, is all I’m saying. That the barrier went down and I took my first out.”
The Deputy Chief of Staff arched his brows. “And she doesn’t know that already from how freakishly protective you are of her?”
“It’s not freakish.”
There was a pause and a deep breath. The loom of a conversation that neither was looking forward to but had to have regardless. With the reprieve from Natchez came the return of the life they belonged to. The place they knew and lived in. The place that had no part in the world of vampires, demons, and apocalypses. In Washington, things had to return to a line of understood and defined fantasy and reality. “Sam…I know this isn’t what you wanna hear, but…you hardly know her.”
“Josh—”
“It wouldn’t work. She’s not even twenty yet. She’s a college student in California. She practices witchcraft. She’s been here with you, with us, since we arrived. You’re the White House Deputy Communications Director. The scandal alone could cripple us for weeks. The Radical Right would burn you in effigy, and I guarantee you it’d come back to haunt us in the primaries.”
Sam scowled. “Scandal, what scandal? She’s a consenting adult, I’m a consenting adult, and even though we haven’t actually consented to do…anything that consenting adults usually consent to, it wouldn’t be illegal if we did.”
“You’re throwing adult out there pretty loosely.”
“It’s not a crime, Josh.”
“Not for Joe Nobody. You’re not Joe Nobody. You’re incredibly recognizable, and furthermore, you know that this is a public relations disaster waiting to happen.”
“Since when is my private life a public relations—”
“Since you work for the President of the United States, and you know that.” Josh expelled a deep breath and shook his head, eyes glued to the floor. “Look, you knew it was gonna be a thing. Better it be a thing now than later, right? Better now when you don’t know her very well. Yeah. I like Willow. I like her a whole, whole lot. Aside being the essential female you, except—you know—a lot smarter, she’s become a good friend of Donna’s and…a good friend of mine. But it can’t work. Not while you hold this job. Not while she’s so young and tied in with this Natchez thing; not to mention a witch. It just can’t happen.”
The room settled. The weighty breaths heaving from either man swallowing the air and claiming it in refuge. There was the burden of knowing what was right and the burden of knowing what should be right. This little time in Natchez, however horrid the circumstances, had drawn them away from the edge of reality. Outside waited the world that judged at the drop of a pin. The world that would see him a cradle-robbing pervert who used his influence in politics to take away the bright futures of clever undergraduates. The world that had not elected this President with a mandate.
There was a line between personal issues and public. The public simply had a funny way of defining what should and shouldn’t be on the front page of their newspapers.
Next year kicked it off for them. Next year was the make-it-or-break-it-year. And already, Sam had incriminated himself by knowing a call-girl, his association with Faith—regardless of circumstance—and now this. A girl not yet twenty. A girl who was legal in the eyes of the law to make her own decisions, yet not old enough to drink alcohol. A girl whose innocence would be smeared with tabloid headlines. Whose future would be ruined with scandal.
“Why are you saying this now?” Sam asked, gaze intent on the floor. “I know you’ve been thinking it for a while. Why now?”
“’Cause the world didn’t end, I guess.” He smiled with a sheepish shrug. “And I haven’t been the only one thinking it. You knew this would be a thing. If you didn’t—”
“I knew it.”
“Yeah.”
“So, what? You were just gonna go along with it?”
Sam shook his head. “I don’t know. I was just…I like her. I like her a lot, Josh. And I promised her we’d work through whatever—”
“You can’t.”
“Josh—”
“You can’t. I know this isn’t fair, but—”
“I promised her. And I’m not going to be this guy.” He sighed deeply. “Maybe if we’d been in and out like we thought, but we weren’t. And I got to know her. And in my defense, this is the first time you’ve mentioned anything—”
Josh held up a hand, frowning. “You knew it without me having to say a word. At least you should have. It’s the same reason you had to stop seeing Laurie.”
“That was wrong, too.”
“We don’t get to decide. It’s them.” He gestured wildly to the wall, though it was understood that he meant the country that waited on the other side. “It’s America. Voters. Polls. Approval ratings. They decide. In this line of work, that’s what decides. It’s unfair—of course it’s unfair, but this is what you chose. You serve at the pleasure of the President. And it’s better to end it now before it’s…” Josh’s voice cut off in mid-sentence, his eyes widening slightly as though the final piece of a puzzle he had been working on for days had settled in completion. “Oh no, Sam.”
The other man recoiled in defense. “What?”
“You don’t.”
“What?”
“You can’t.”
“What?”
“God, you do. In just two weeks?”
His eyes widened. “Josh, what?”
“You love her.”
Sam blinked dumbly. “I…Josh!”
“Oh God. This is a nightmare.” The Deputy Chief of Staff heaved a deep sigh and bit the inside of his cheek. Then glanced down and finally up again, new resignation settling in his eyes. “Look, how ‘bout I butt out and let CJ chew your ass off? Someone who doesn’t know the both of you.”
“And that’ll help?”
“It’ll help me. I’ve seen you two together. If you think this is any fun for me, you are sadly mistaken, my friend.” He shook his head. “I really didn’t wanna be this guy, either. And neither did Toby. No one wants to be this guy.”
“Well, that’s surprising.”
Josh grinned a bit at that. “I think we’re all a little more open-minded after this thing. And no one wants to be the one to tell you to not be with someone you want to be with.” He licked his lips. “Have you two talked about how this thing would work, if you decide to…have you talked about it?”
“No.” Sam frowned. “Well, we’ve talked a little, but I thought we had more time.”
“Yeah, okay.” Josh nodded and motioned to the door again. “You should go pack, though. If she wakes up, I’ll come get you.”
“Okay.” A pause. “Does Donna know?”
“I’m gonna go get her after you’re done packing.” He shrugged. “We’re trying to get you as much time as possible.”
“I know. Thanks.” Sam stopped again before he stepped into the hallway, tossing a glance back to the motionless redhead and exhaling deeply. “You’ll come get me?”
“Sam—”
“Okay.” And he was gone.
Josh sighed again and turned to Willow with a wry grin. “He likes you,” he told her, uncaring that she didn’t hear him. “Yeah. Of all the people to like. Not that I don’t like you, too…this is a match made in Heaven and organized in Hell.”
His voice fell dead around him with no one to answer.
In the early rise of morn, the townhouse was as it ever had been. Stretching with silence that had led them to the cliff they had jumped just yesterday.
And not even a breath to spare before their reality returned.
*~*~*
Wesley started a bit when Donna knocked on the door to his bedroom, open as it was. And consequentially, blushed brightly when he realized the shrill peep that bounced off the walls belonged to him. The disarming smile on her face only served to trouble his nerves, and though feeling tense and foolish, he could not help but smile back.
“Hello.”
She waved shyly. “Hi. Ummm…can I…?”
“Oh, certainly.” He gestured inarticulately. “Come in.”
Her smile wavered a bit but she stepped over the threshold in time. “I really don’t want to interfere with anything, but we’re getting ready to leave, and I just needed…I wanted to apologize.”
The incident to which she was referring was clear in his mind, having been stuck on replay in the few but endless moments between crises. However, Wesley was—first and foremost—a gentleman. And though he had not expected anything along the lines of mentioning to their one and only night ever again, the notion that she wanted to say anything had his mind spinning in seconds. “I’m sorry?”
A nervous titter sounded through her throat. “That’s sort’ve my line.”
“Donna—”
“I acted badly that night.”
If that was her definition of bad behavior, it was better for everyone if they kept Donnatella Moss as far from the Hellmouth as possible. Wesley smiled slightly and shifted from one leg to the other. “Look, I—”
“I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. I didn’t…what I said that night—”
“You said you were in love with Josh.”
Her alabaster skin flamed, her eyes as wide as saucers. “Well, I don’t! I’m…I’m not. That was a thing. It was…the world ending and Josh is…the longest relationship with a man that I’ve ever had, platonic as it’s been, so in a moment of panic that I would die alone, my mind reached out and…” A pitiful look overwhelmed her features when she saw she wasn’t convincing him. “I am not in love with Josh.”
Wesley licked his lips and glanced down. “Okay.”
“I’m not.”
“Okay.”
“I’m not in love with Josh, and I shouldn’t have said that that night. I shouldn’t have…because it’s not true, and because you and I had just…but more importantly, because it’s not true.” Donna stopped and closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose with a sigh. “I didn’t mean that. I—”
He nodded gently and held up a hand. “It’s fine. I won’t tell anyone. Who would I tell? If you love Josh—”
“Which I don’t!”
“—which you don’t, it’s hardly any of my business. He would be a lucky man to have you, if he ever realized it himself. And…it was lovely spending time with you. That night…awkward as it was, was definitely the best night of this trip.”
She smiled prettily. “Thank you. Me…me, too.”
“Donna—”
“I’m sorry. I really, really am. I didn’t mean to—”
He nodded again. “I’m fine. It’s fine. We…it’s fine. I hope…well, if we meet again, I hope it’s under different circumstances.”
“Yeah, I think that goes without say.”
He grinned as she lowered her eyes in farewell, nodded a little, and pivoted to leave. “Donna?” She stopped at the door and turned back to him. “If you do...” His hands came up in a sign of neutrality. “And I’m not saying you do. But if you do, you know, love Josh…it’s okay. I hope you know that.”
She licked her lips. “No, it’s really not.”
“I won’t presume to understand how American politics work anymore than what I know from catching the news and the occasional turn in Congressional seats. I know that the President is limited to two terms of four years each…I don’t understand, really, why working in politics makes it impossible for you to have a personal life.” He turned his head slightly and nodded in the direction of the room she had stayed in for the past several days. “Sound carries in here. Josh and Sam were arguing about Sam’s relationship with Willow. I’m presuming that your loving Josh would illicit the same sort of scandal that Sam’s relationship with a nineteen-year old Wiccan undergraduate would.”
“Not quite. But…along the same lines…if we got involved. Which we won’t.”
“Right.”
“Because I don’t love him. And did you say that sound carries?” Her eyes darted worriedly to the hallway. “Oh God—”
“They’re downstairs,” Wesley reassured her. “Sam came in here just before you did to ask me to keep an eye on Willow while they packed up the Winnebago. I wouldn’t have mentioned it had they been down the hall.”
“Yeah…since we’re taking the Winnebago, what are you guys using?”
“The President has arranged for the Winnebago or some form of transportation to be delivered back to us within two hours of your arrival in Jackson. It gives us time to locate Faith, anyway. Achieve our original objective.”
“Oh.” Her eyes widened. “Oh, God. Faith.”
“Yes, that’s pretty much what we did around five o’clock this morning.” He sighed and removed his glasses, whipping out a handkerchief at the same moment. “We haven’t been able to pry Spike away from Buffy—”
“Is she awake yet?”
“No. But she’s fine. As far as we can tell…” He frowned and shook his head. “Anyway, Spike says he left Faith at Longwood when Quirinias hit Buffy. While we do not presume to think she is still there, by any means…I don’t believe she was strong enough at that point, even as a Slayer, to free herself. The keepers of Longwood likely helped her down. And if not, once Spike is able to, we’re going to ask him to track her by scent.”
“Not Willow?”
“Not Willow. Not any magic right now. Not for a while…not after what she just went through.” A beat. “Anyway, you and the others taking the Winnebago gives us time to find her. And the sooner the better. I hesitate to consider the state we will find the Hellmouth in when we return.”
She smiled slightly and nodded. There was nothing else to say to that. “Thank you, Wesley.”
“You’re more than welcome.” She almost made it out the door before he raised his voice to stop her once more. “Donna?”
“Yes?”
“You’ve been staying here for a little more than two weeks, and you haven’t noticed that sound carries?”
She shrugged. “I’m a heavy sleeper. Goodbye, Wes.”
“Goodbye. I’ll keep my eye out for you when I watch CSPAN.”
“You’ll be looking for nothing, but if I ever do manage to get on CSPAN, I’ll wave just for you.” She smiled her concluding goodbye and at last left without interruption.
Wesley sighed and stared at the empty doorway for long seconds. Then turned, closed his suitcase with a mind to finish packing later, and followed in the course so that he might be with Willow if she came awake before the Senior Staffers made their leave.
But even at that, there was something else. For whatever reason, the air of finale that everyone expected had yet to settle.
And that alone made him edgier than he wanted to admit.
*~*~*
“This thing is monstrous,” Sam said, settling in the driver’s seat. While his sense of direction had wound up the punch line of many jokes, a full circle was a complete road of ineptitude where navigation was concerned. It had been Toby driving at last turn, though notably off Josh’s directions that he never double-checked after Leo provided them. And though the men seemed to agree that Donna needed a turn behind the wheel, the blonde deftly refused and instead opted the passenger seat.
“You should ask Josh how to drive it,” Donna said, tossing her boss a coy look over her shoulder. “He’s the one that drove it into a wall.”
“I did not drive it into a wall.”
She quirked a brow. “Was there a wall?”
“It was invisible.”
“Thank you for that astute observation, Josh. Was there a wall?”
A begrudging pause. “Yes.”
“Did you drive into it?”
“…Yes.”
“So you drove into a wall.” She and Sam shared a secretive grin. “You see how much easier your life would be if you just listened to me?”
Josh made a low noise. “Yeah, ‘cause that’s happening.”
“And in the meantime, you’ll be driving at full speed into walls.”
“It was invisible!”
“You still drove into it.”
Toby growled, almost inaudibly. “I swear, I almost miss the cat.” He caught the look the comment earned from the Deputy Chief of Staff and slammed the words back into his mouth with another long groan. “Oh dear God.”
That was all the fuel Donna needed. She twisted in her seat to face them, eyes alight with revelation. “Aha!”
“No. Just stop,” the elder man grunted.
Josh glared at him. “See what you did?”
“The cat. The cat was spotted and the world nearly ended. I’d like to see you try and mock me now.”
“Why bother? It’s no fun when you make it so easy.”
“Since when?”
“Since now. Leave me alone.”
“Not until you cut me a break on the cat.”
“Forget the cat!”
Sam glanced into the rearview mirror as he pulled onto the highway. In just minutes they would drive by Devereaux, the grand antebellum home that welcomed those coming in from the north. “You know,” he said, “she has a point. The cat has been sighted—”
“Sam—”
“—prior to every national tragedy, including some of the more recent ones.”
“There was no national tragedy,” Toby grunted.
“Oh, yeah. If the apocalypse had actually come, that wouldn’t have been a national problem at all,” the other man replied, arching a brow. “Why can’t either of you acknowledge with everything that has happened that there might be some credibility—”
The Communications Director threw his head back and groaned. “I honestly can’t believe we are still having this conversation.”
Donna grinned wildly. “Kinda puts everything in perspective, doesn’t it?”
“If by everything, you mean your obsession with stupid urban legends,” Josh replied, “then yes.”
Sam snickered and sent her a kind smile. She just shrugged and settled back.
The Winnebago fell silent, then. Zooming down the highway on the way home.
*~*~*
Something is wrong.
Her mind was spinning—that sort of spin that took one and sat them down in a chair and made them rotate until it was time to gag. Her eyes were weighed down with exhaust and a lack of willpower to open them. She was tumbling down a tunnel of colors, her stomach dropping every few seconds, forcing her breath to catch with each inhalation. It was a slow struggle to awareness. A line she saw without seeing anything. Her sharper senses stirring to wakefulness while trying unsuccessfully to convince her body to follow.
Something is wrong.
That alone, that sense of dread originating from nowhere, churned her stomach with compounds she could not identify. There were voices around her. Familiar voices. Voices she would know when her memory caught up with her mind. When everything came back as it did in those first initial moments following a long night’s rest.
She didn’t want to get up. She wanted to lie in seclusion forever. But she couldn’t.
Something is wrong.
Something…something…
It hit her out of nowhere. A train wreck in the midst of her internal struggle. One that struck fast but started from miles away. And Willow felt the wind knock out of her as her eyes flew open, a gasp clawing for freedom as the voices around her matched with faces.
Something…
“Willow!” That was Giles, rushing to her side. “Willow, are you—”
But she wasn’t listening. Couldn’t. Something was wrong.
“Oh God.”
And she knew what.
*~*~*
It was nothing like the first time.
The first time had been safe, almost playful. A casual scolding from a force they hadn’t known with the intent of punishing them in ignorance. The vehicle had ricocheted a little, though endured no real damage. It hadn’t exactly been a cakewalk, but it hadn’t been like this.
There hadn’t been screeching metal. The tires hadn’t burned the asphalt. The airbags hadn’t gone off.
The first time it was like bouncing off rubber. This time, it was a wall. A real one.
And they crashed into it. Again.
And while not at full speed, at a damn good one.
TBC